“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that every one who believes into Him would not perish, but would have eternal life” (John 3:16). I received the Lord and got baptized shortly after I came to the United States one year ago. One year is not long. But during this most wonderful period of my life, my experience of Christ has been so enormous and my enjoyment of the Lord so rich that it is really hard for me to give a summary within the space limit.
As a Chinese, I was born and educated to be an atheist. It was difficult for me to accept the existence of God because of the significant impact that my atheistic education during my childhood had cast on the development and formation of my personal mentality and value system. Besides, I am a person of arrogance, believing everything is under the control of personal will, capability and effort. Therefore, I used to grossly dismiss all the religious matters including gospel preaching as superstitious, being unwilling to even listen to or think about it. By the Lord’s divine sovereignty and special arrangement, I got a chance to come to the States, to receive the Lord, and to enjoy meeting with Christians on Campus here in Austin. Through my experience during the past year, the Lord has used one situation after another to demonstrate to me that my past arrogance was just ignorance and my past adamancy on the nonexistence of God was so easily conquered by His gently touching me with His divine love and grace.
In retrospect, I am amazed by so many drastic changes that the Lord has brought to my life and inner being that I have continuously asked myself the same question: “Why me?” I was just a wretch, totally unworthy of His eternal salvation. Why did the Lord choose me to receive so many graces and blessings from Him? Whenever I have that question and close my eyes, I feel the Lord is graciously smiling at me. Then I just feel completely bathed in His love outpoured through the tacit, sweet fellowship between us. The Lord seems to speak to me: “My child, I called you not because of what you did. I selected you just because I love you…” Yes, it is His divine love, a love so unconditional and so unreasonable that qualifies me to receive Him as my eternal salvation!
“What shall I give unto the Lord for all, for all, for all He’s done for me? I’ll take the cup of salvation, and call, and call, and call upon the name of the Lord” (Hymns #1336). Lord, what can I give to You in return for Your divine love? Just one year ago, I was so eager to enter the United States to pursue my personal American dream after having failed one time after another. By the Lord’s mercy and grace, I finally succeeded in getting to the States, but my enjoyment of the Lord has reached such an extent that my personal success and accomplishment are no longer my American dream. “Dear Lord, from the moment I received You, my dream was already realized. You are my final American dream!”
